That pink ribbon affects us all in some way

Everyone loves my mom. My mother is nice and pretty and always pleasent to people. She can bake yummy delicious treats and always loves to give people gifts. She's also funny and can keep a secret. Everyone loves her, and wonders how she got stuck with a daughter like me.

The truth is, in my defense, my mother is a nag. If she's not yelling at me about one thing it's another. My favorite line to throw in her face when she is bitching at me about why I do this and that is, "I do it so you have something to nag at me about!" I say this because I honestly think that if she didn't have something to nag about she would die.

When I was younger, between the ages of 13-20 I couldn't stand my mom. I didn't like talking to her, listening to her, anything she said or did was retarded to me. I was your typical teenager that hated her mother. I felt like I had nothing in common with her, she knew NOTHING about my life and how I felt or what I was going through. My mom grew up a military brat and was constantly moving. She never went to the same school two years in a row, she went to 4 different high schools in 3 different states. My mom never had the time to make real friendships with anyone The moment she really started to bond with someone, her family moved away. She never had a real best friend. This made her very independent, and a little bit of an introvert. She doesn't really like social situations and having to mingle with large groups.
She also is very private. I know very little about her life before she married my dad. I don't know of any previous boyfriends, or what she did for fun, nothing. It isn't like I haven't asked her, I have...she simply tells me it's none of my concern. All I know is that she fell in love with my dad and they have been married for almost 30 years now.
My mother gives me everything, but the one thing she couldn't give me was being a member of my church. She has taken the discussions over a dozen times, but she just does not believe. She told me when I was younger that she would join if I wanted her to, but I knew she did not believe. I always stood by her with this decision. I agreed that for her to be a part of something she had no belief in would be disrespectful. I am only now starting to understand that I might have taken a different path had I might of had my mother sitting with me in church all those years....

I say these things in preface to the real story I want to tell.

October is breast cancer awarness month, and I was sitting watching an episode of LA Ink that was really focused around breat cancer, and survivors getting tattoos...yada, yada, yada.
As I was watching and listening to all the stories of people finding out they have cancer, or loved ones dying of cancer I thought, "gosh, I don't relate to these people at all..."
But then I really thought about it. Cancer has been in my life a few times. My grandfather died of lung cancer 10 years ago. It was horrible, but it was only a matter of a month from the time we found out to the time he died. One of my mom's closest friends passed away from breast cancer after battling it for years. I know a handful of my friends that have had a cancer scare as well.

And then I remembered my mother's experience.

When I was ten years old my mother had to have a lumpectomy on one of her breasts. It ended up being nothing, and I was young so I didn't understand.

But now that I am an adult the memory disturbed me.

I remembered the day she went to the doctor and they told her she had to have the lumpectomy. She was wearing a white blouse and a blue and white checkered skirt. It was a sunny day and I remember my dad took me somewhere while she was at her appointment. I remember her standing on the sidewalk as we walked up to her. I don't remember what she said to me, but I remember being happy to see her. After that the only memory I have is her being in bed after the lumpectomy and seeing her bandages, and that's it. That was all there was to it. Because the lump ended up being benign, nothing was ever said about it again. I don't even think they really said anything to me about it at all.

I can't stop thinking about what would have happened had the lump been something? What if my mom did have cancer all those years ago? What if she had died? Who would have nagged me for all these years? Who would have been here as a constant reminder that I could be so much better if I was only like my mother?

Life might have been different for me had my mother joined the church along with my dad. I might be married and have a minivan full of snotty nosed children by now. I might not be in this no man's land of wondering where I belong or questioning every decision I make when it comes to certain aspects of my life.

But then I think of how life would be without my mom, and I am thankful to my Heavenly Father for reminding me of how blessed I really am to have her as my mother. I wouldn't trade her for anything. I know that I am lucky, and the older I get the more I try to be just like her. I know some girls would hate to hear, "you sound just like your mom" but I don't, because if someone thinks that I sound like my mom then I must sound like a really great person. I love my mom, she is the classiest, prettiest, funniest person I know.

I know that some people say that their mother's are their best friends, but mine isn't. She's so much more than that to me, she's my mom...nagging and all.

Now that you've read my story, if you're lucky enough to be able to, go tell your own mom how much you love her.